Jinny, I miss you. I can’t believe it’s been about a year. The feelings have subsided but I miss you sooooo much.
I personally didn’t think you would actually come to check up on me again.
After you, I dated in vain for the past two boyfriends I had. I mean— they just wanted to have someone, so I was that “someone” in a sense. I didn’t think it was serious.
But now I’m in love again; since school started, I saw a childhood friend. Sometimes he’s a really good kid, and other times he makes me cry— but for some strange reason, he makes me happy, and I’m so unbearably in love with him. Just like how I was with you.
Funny how I saw your message just now. My tumblr didn’t give me notifications about any new messages whether they were anonymous or not, so of course I didn’t think anything happened. I was just checking just in case.
And I’m pretty glad I did.
How are you? Are you doing well?
I miss you, and Lead Me, and our RP clique. I miss Kyungjoo/Namsoo. I just miss everything.
I hope you see this, Jinseo.
I was a test subject today for my teacher, and an assistant for my friend. My teacher is also the school photographer, and him and my parents are close friends.
The thing was, I was an assistant today for my friend Julie who was taking her photos by my teacher. Around the time my photo was being taken, she was getting ready. My friend is a senior in high school and so she’s taking her senior portraits by my teacher ^^
Here’s one of the photos from today! I think it’s lovely.
That K-pop dance showcase was really fun! I’m glad I could be with my best friend and my boyfriend and it wasn’t awkward. I love those two!
honestly though, Can I go to another one? Because honestly I think I reallllllly want to win a prize ^^ maybe I should just plan one instead? HAHAHA
soooo glad I brought katherine along with me though, HAHAHA we almost killed each other screaming omg
in my opinion, the dance groups could have danced a lot better… if they were to dance to some hard-ass-get-down-on-the-floor-and-sweat dance THEY CAN’T FUCKING DANCE SOME HALF-ASSED-WEAKLY-PRACTICED DANCE. if that’s how they practiced, they should have danced an easier song like idk, a girl song -.-
one of the games was a Q+A thing… and all of those were easy T_T
…but other girls went before me so…
dammit. high light of my night was when Kat wanted to show dong my derp photos
and i like.. pulled his face back so he wouldn’t see OTL so fucking embarrassing i cry
Jinseo isn’t my boyfriend anymore, Dongwon is. He makes me happier more than anything and I think I can speak for myself at a time like this. Honestly speaking, maybe if you didn’t disappear all of a sudden, Jinseo, we’d still be together.
We’d still laugh over whatsapp and leave messages on each other’s tumblrs.
We’d still love each other, even though we were so far apart.
But how do people love each other when all they’re doing is lying to themselves? Making each other think that we can spend a lifetime together after we finish school and still keep in touch gives someone high expectations— and you gave me that. I thought you would visit me over the summer and leave me with some reassurance that I’m not so alone in this world, that I don’t have to be sad all the time.
But no. I was lied to, repeatedly.
Dong is a sweet heart. Has he lied to me yet? No, and I love that about him. He’s a dork, but he’s smart. He knows what to say to make me feel better about myself and about others. He’s not a bad kid. I find it funny how both your Christian names are Jason though. He reminded me of you when he told me that.
But you, Jinseo… I loved you a lot. I hope you know that.
WAIT WHO ARE YOU ANONYMOUS YOU REMIND ME OF SOMEONE
1. I fell in love with a complete dork in the late summer of 2012. <3
2. My hair is thick, jet black and straight. You can’t get anymore Asian than that.
3. I love to sing and dance! I’m just shy about dancing in front of family and classmates orz
4. I’ve had my tumblr since january of 2011, so it’s been two years already hehe c:
5. At first I thought Exo was a total group of kiss-asses. I first I didn’t like them, especially Kai. I thought he was a total show-off. (I didn’t even learn their names through all the teasers, I leaned their names through my timeline here and on twitter orz) And then I fell in love with him and then I started liking his band members and asdkhkgjhasd It’s a love-hate relationship now LOL.
hugs and butterfly kisses to you too sweetie, xoxo <3
I know, it would have been nice! I really want to hear his opinion of me. <3
How did he and I meet?
The internetz. Hehe. I met him through tumblr.
I was just going about my daily routine over the summer. I had nothing to do, because the house was cleaned, I’m too young to work, and I had no money to go out; I was basically a couch potato.
So, to help my boredom, I went on tumblr, following new people from here and there. some of them weren’t kpop fans, but the rest were, and he ended up being one of them.
He had a selca on his tumblr, and I thought, “Oh, well he’s adorable. He has a nice blog,” so I followed him.
A few days after or so, he followed me back (What’s weird is that he told me he rarely follows anyone back), and I said, “Thanks for the follow-back, I appreciate it!”
And from there, we started talking to each other nonstop. And throughout the weeks, I just ended up developing feelings for him.
I didn’t even think it was possible at first, and like I said, I had many doubts. Sometimes I still doubt and over-think, but I gotta deal with it.
Apparently, he also developed feelings for me too, especially throughout the weeks that we have been talking. He told me that he was never shy around anyone until he met me. And I remember, because that day was the most amazing day of my life.
As weird as it sounds, we started confessing to each outher because as we talked on Facebook, he started to type in lyrics to A-Pink’s “It Girl,” and just changed it to lyrics of a boy’s perspective.
"I wanna be that boy that can be with you forever. So tell me, will you be my girlfriend?"
I thought he was serious, so I said, “Yes! <3”
I thought he was being totally serious but he was just singing. I didn’t want to be talking to him because I was really awkward. Don’t misunderstand, because the situation was weird. I thought it was pretty embarrassing too.
But hey, I guess that way, by my weird, direct answers, we ended up dating. The rest is history! <3
I wish he still had one. He deleted it :/
And hey, why so shy? Let me hug youuuuuu <3
You’re such a lovely follower.
I’m just wondering, but may I know who the anon is? (:
Thank you! I’m just stating my personal opinion, really. But I try to make it as non-offensive as possible! Hehe.
Nah, not famous at all.
He acts like it though. Not in a snobby way, but in a cute way.
Like if I told him, “Good job on your exam scores!” He’d go, ” *flips hair*"
How do I survive? I just do. Simply living on from the fact that you know someone out there is able to love you like that seems to be enough.
Hard? It’s not that hard unless you make it out to be. To be honest, I had doubts about the relationship, and I never really bothered about doing anything.
Over-thinking is shit. Too much of it starts killing you from the inside out. Sometimes, when I’m worried about how he’s doing, whether he’s cheating on me, or whether he has been lying to me, that really… pulls on my feelings, and I can’t do anything about it. Thoughts like those spread like wildfire. And it sucks.
But even if it’s not true, unless you don’t base the relationship on trust and loyalty, the whole relationship would be the eptiome of useless.
Even with all the negatives, there are still positives, and those are the big things. They matter the most. The love you have for each other, or the small little conversations with “stupid pick-up lines,” or “retellings of yesterday’s news” really matter. Those small moments are the ones to be cherished, like the love separated by seas and lands and basically distance.
I feel like I’m writing a book. I find loves like this to be the most precious, second to the love that God has for us. But that’s my opinion. What’s your’s?
A boy— a man. A little bit in between.
He is… a cutie. (How do I really explain this?)
He’s a sweetie. One that has many moods. He laughs over the big things and looks over the small things. He’s sensitive, sometimes taking things seriously. And maybe somehow, when I didn’t expect it, I fell in love with this kid. I can’t tell you who he is exactly, but maybe it’s just because his whole character is lovable.
And thank you! I appreciate it. Were you being honest? Haha.
Really? Do you like it? Ohohohoho. I try (;
"It sounds pretty"?
ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT MY LITTLE SNIPPET FROM WHATSAPP BC THAT WAS GROSS OMG I SWEAR URGH
I actually sang it in the school’s bathroom LOL
Singing in the bathroom’s nice. no one hears you unless they’re in the bathroom (bc the door is thick orz)
and yeah. maybe it was a little bit gross. I was in school uniform and everything ew gawd
Whoooo~ break is here, finally
Now I can work on fixing up my page bc it looks whack lol k